Toxic Body Positivity. Is It As Horrible As Some Say?
Hi Musers. Welcome back to part 3 of my article, reviewing the YouTube video by ObeseToBeast, who is commenting on a video by creator Coco Chanou about body positivity being toxic. While I don’t like the idea of toxic body positivity, I do suspect it exists.
Unfortunately, today’s post is going to be a shorter post than the one I had planned. The reason is simple – depression. I’ve decided to go back on medication but can’t get an appointment with my doctor until Nov 1st. Until then, I’ll have to get through as best I can.
It hasn’t been easy. I know I’ve been hard to live with and have had problems at work due to my attitude. I feel like I’m not able to be at work, but I have no choice. I can’t just take six weeks off till the medication might be working.
Back To Toxic Body Positivity
If you haven’t read part 1 or part 2, you’re more than welcome to dive in here, but it might be wiser to start with them first. A link to the video I’m reviewing is included in the other articles, but I’ll put it here too, so you don’t have to go looking. Who loves ya, baby?
Picking up from where I left off, Coco is having a rant about the BoPo community acting as gatekeepers, and questioning why they would attack her when she didn’t;t tag body positivity or mention it at all. I’m with her here, I don’t believe we should be on patrol on the internet attacking misuse of BoPo phrases or words. It’s not nice, and there are much better ways to educate others if that’s the goal. If it’s not, then honestly, I don’t think it’s anyone else’s business to comment.
At this point, OTB raises an intriguing point. He says he doesn’t believe the people who do this are truly body positive. They want to be but inside still feel ashamed, and as a cover to this shame, they attack others. I don’t know what to say to this.
I can only speak from my own experience. I genuinely believe I am body positive. I am fine with my body as it is. I also feel no need to attack people who might be calling themselves curvy when they don’t appear to be. In my case, if I feel it’s essential, I might post a gentle post with an alternate point of view. The vast majority of the time, though, I move on without comment.
Toxic Body Positivity And Weight Loss
In the next section, Coco discusses that health shaming is stupid. She asks why should we focus on this one element when there are pollutants in the air, people smoke, drink, etc.? Hear, hear, couldn’t agree more. OTB chips in and says he agrees with most of HAES, but it’s different at extremes of high or low weight.
This is where I have to remind everyone that it is not healthY at every size. The movement simply says, whatever your weight start by focussing on healthy behaviours rather than weight loss. Doing that will positively impact your health without sucking you into diet culture, which could actually make matters worse.
Coco then says if you’re happy with your weight and don’t want to lose weight, that’s fine. However, some people do want to lose weight, not from a place of self-hatred but because they don’t feel comfortable in their bodies. I wrote about intentional weight loss a few posts ago, so you can check out my full thoughts there. My response is this, yes you absolutely can want to lose weight because you’re uncomfortable in your skin or to regain an ability. However, I suspect many people say they’re doing it for this reason, but deep down, it’s all about diet culture.
Weight And Self Love
John insists that he absolutely believes you can gain weight as a form of self-love, but you can lose weight for self-love reasons too. That eating healthily and exercising to keep the only body that we have in good shape is a good thing. Again, I agree. If all of this is coming from a place of wanting to take care of yourself, it’s a very, very good thing. However, it can lead to disordered eating and diet culture so easily. That’s the danger.
The video rounds off with Coco explaining why she lost weight, and she explains she thought she’d be applauded for her efforts to lose weight as it was based on health. Nope. Lots more abuse and being told she was making others feel horrible.
Sigh. The whole point of being body positive is that you learn to love your body as it is. If you’ve truly done that, why would another person’s actions impact you? It shouldn’t, and I object to the toxic body positivity element that attacks all attempts at weight loss.
Please remember when we tell fatphobes that our bodies are not their business, that applies to us too! What someone else chooses to do with their body is their business. Period. We can encourage them, put an opposing point of view across, try to educate them, but in the end, it is their body and their choice!
No one should be bullied for making a different choice. This shit right here is one of the reasons I moved from body positivity to body liberation. This is an example of toxic body positivity and something I do not agree with.
Til Next Time
That’s all for today, Musers. I could probably have written another three articles on this video I but I don’t want to stay on one topic for too long. If you have any issues you think I’ve missed, please let me know in the comments 👇 Until then, look after yourselves, body and mind!
