5 Reasons It’s So Difficult To Be Happy
Today we’re going to talk about the reasons it’s so difficult to be happy nowadays. I’ve been very candid in this blog about my struggles with mental health. While I think that I may have more mental health issues than some, I know that I’m certainly not the only sufferer either in the UK or worldwide. Is depression more prevalent now, or do we simply have the means to talk about it when we didn’t before? I suspect it may be both of these things.
After a lot of soul-searching, navel-gazing, and general agonising over why I can’t just be happy, I thought I would share a few of the conclusions I’ve come up with. I’ll be very interested to know if you agree or not and also if there’s anything you feel I’ve missed.
1) Messed Up Brain Chemistry
Depression is a physical illness caused by imbalances in our brain chemistry. Depression may start as a reaction to a particular event but not always. Even when it does, it may still progress to clinical depression later. Antidepressants help regulate the chemistry a little, but in my case, at least it certainly has not cured it. If I can never affect my chemistry permanently for the better, how can I feel happy?
2) Social Media
I’ve talked about it a lot, but social media can leave you feeling really freakin’ inadequate. Almost daily, I learn about university students who start million-pound businesses. See people’s homes with perfect decor and a tidy garden. Scan the photos of a once-in-a-lifetime holidays. Even when the posts aren’t that epic, I’m jealous of how happy people seem. I wonder why I can’t feel like that.
3) 24 News Cycles
Not so long ago, the main sources of news were newspapers, a maximum of a couple of times a day. The news at 6 pm and 10 pm were the live versions. So if you found the news really, really depressing, you could avoid it. Not any more. News is EVERYWHERE! Social media, newspapers, tv, radio, adverts, news sites and billboards. You cannot get away from it.
I also remember, in better times, that the tv news usually ended with a funny or light-hearted item to leave on a high. Now it is relentless misery. It’s a never-ending stream of war, rape, murder, child abuse, animal abuse, pandemics and wave after wave of political scandals. I try to avoid the news because of the effect on my mood. It’s not possible anymore.
4) Perception
Are we meant to be happy all the time? I have a sneaking suspicion that we aren’t and that human beings never have been. However, that is the dream we’ve been given. I think it’s a lie. We feel more unhappy with our lives because we believe we’re meant to be happy and that being happy is easy to do. If I just accept that I’m not supposed to be happy constantly, will it be easier to be happy some of the time?
5) Lack Of Purpose
I have gifts, and I’m sure of that. However, I don’t feel like I use them the majority of the time. I’m not challenged, and I don’t get to do things that I’m good at, things I feel absorbed by. The modern workplace is a meat grinder. It exists to make money for the world’s rich. A job for life, one where you feel valued, simply does not exist anymore.
I do get some satisfaction from my writing, but it’s only part-time. I know many people write full time and make good money, but I don’t have the confidence to give up my job. I could look for a writing job, but the ones I’ve found tend to be freelance or self-employed. I’m too risk-averse to do that. I need a secure, dependable paycheck. So I continue to toil from 9-5 and feel tired, uninspired, and frequently sad.
Conclusion
I think the takeaway from all this is that life is hard. Being happy is not necessarily the default for all of us. For people like me who have dysthymia, sadness is the default, with rare flashes of happiness. Believe it or not, this article is not supposed to be a bummer. I want people who feel like me to know they’re not alone. To know there isn’t something wrong with them when everyone else is fine. If that’s how you feel, please know that it’s tough for all of us. We just have to hang in there.
