10 Ways To Love Yourself As A Fat Person Part 1
The new year is the time the diet and fitness industries come out swinging. Their propaganda is everywhere, and the message is always the same; you need to change. I hate this because I don’t believe anyone has the right to tell you that. I want you to learn to love yourself as a fat person.
Every person is unique, and they are wonderful. Some are thin and some fat, some tall and some short, blonde, redhead, brunette, grey, or funky multi-coloured like me. Athleticism varies, eye colour and skin tone. The infuriating thing is that everyone accepts all the other elements that make up a person’s appearance as just the way they are. They reserve their hatred, vitriol and intolerance only for fat people. I suspect some people secretly believe a howling bigot is a more worthwhile person than a fat one. It’s shocking and sad.
So as someone who has ditched diet culture and learned to love herself, here are my tips to love yourself. As Mama Rupaul Charles says, “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?” Amen, Mama Ru!
1) Ask People Why They Love You
This might sound strange, but if you ask your friends and family for three things they love most about you, I’d be shocked if more than one was to do with your appearance. Their list will help you realise that you’re more than a body and an amazing person. I found it helped me learn to put far less emphasis on my weight when considering my self-worth.
2) Make Friends With Your Body
If you’re going to learn to love yourself as a fat person, you need to make peace with your body. You need to say sorry to it for all the diets, the starvation, the punishing workouts. Then you need to thank it for all it does for you because your body is an incredible machine. Sit quietly and just be. Talk to your body kindly, either in your head or out loud. Make peace with it.
3) See What Your Body Can Do
If you don’t want to exercise, you don’t have to. I’m not sneaking in workout advice. If you want to see how remarkable your body is, see what it can do. It may involve exertion, like lifting weights to see how strong you can become or yoga to see how much flexibility you have. But it could also be something fun like learning to hula hoop or teaching yourself to cartwheel. If you’re used to thinking you can’t do x, y or z because you’re fat, then put those thoughts aside and give it a go!
Once you appreciate how much your body can do you will learn to love yourself and stop judging your weight.
4) Learn To Look In The Mirror
If you’re anything like I used to be, you’ll do anything to avoid looking in the mirror because it makes you want to cry. Head and shoulders is bad enough, but full-length or shudder changing rooms?? Forget about it. Try to spend a few minutes a day looking at yourself in the mirror. If negative thoughts flood your mind, answer them with “and that’s ok”.
I’m so fat – and that’s ok
My arms jiggle – and that’s ok
I have huge belly rolls – and that’s ok
Get the idea? You need to start changing the script, and it’s counter-productive to try to stop the thoughts at first. You just need to have an answer ready.
5) Flood Your Social Media With Different Body Types
Instagram‘s algorithm is a total dick and displays a marked preference for thin white bodies unless you’re very firm with it. It took me a loooong time to see a wider range of normal bodies. Now I can see white, black, Asian, Native American and Inuit folks of all different heights, weights, differently-abled, quirk dressers, piercings and tattoos.
It is glorious! It has woken me up to the gorgeous diversity of the human form, and I hope it’ll do the same for you.
See You Next Time
That’s all for today, folks. I’ll be back in a few days with ways 6-10 to learn to love yourself. Feel free to pop any tips you have in the comments.
